i genuinely believe that 2012 was the optimal tumblr experience. like if you didnt live through 2012, you havent fully understood how much of a hell site this is. to jog some ppl’s memories:
francieum
quirkybrittany
justgirlythings
“I like your shoelaces” “I stole them from the president” and people actually fucking doing this in public
we still called porn fics “smut” and “lemons”
“you must be fun at parties”
cole sprouse’s tumblr social experiment, and some people taking it so seriously that they threatened mass suicide
mitt romney
hetastuck (hetalia and homestuck fandoms were moirails i guess)
hussieruya (people unironically shipping the creators of hetalia and homestuck)
andrew hussie actually asking about hussieruya in his twitter
the obsession with andrew hussie’s lips
superwholock fandom (this was their prime)
supernatural has a gif for everything
“Fuck you watson” somehow being praised as the best comeback possible?? ok lol
hipster side of tumblr vs fandom side of tumblr, and all those pictures of the two coexisting to bring some sort of peace? as if we were at war with each other?? wtf was up with that
the dumbest fake stories holy shit, and everyone believed them
benedict cumberbatch everywhere
that sherlock gif of benedict cumberbatch looking into a door’s peep hole and people saying how if you cover one side of his face he looks confident but if you cover the other side he looks sad, so they said he’s the best actor in the world or whatever
gangnam style everywhere
people being shamed from using memes or even saying the word meme
“Oh, you facebook people think tumblr is boring? Well, we’ll find you…Supernatural fandom, grab your demons! Sherlock fandom, grab your Watsons! Doctor Who fandom, grab your Tardises! Harry Potter fandom, grab your wands! Homestuck fandom, grab your strife cards! Hetalia fandom, grab your pasta!” proceed for 1628519 more fandoms
“im pretty sure thats taylor swift” “no thats becky”
the dancing chandler gif from friends
“Reblog if you dont have a problem with gay marriage!” followed by ten mile long additions of rainbow gifs and pictures and 9gag memes
potato jesus (i’ll admit, this was actually funny)
the reblog button being at the top of posts
cuil theory, aka “i give you a hamburger”
27 comments on a post just saying “INSTANT REBLOG” or “PRESS PLAY”
song mixups from people “accidentally opening a bunch of tabs playing music” but it was actually from a pop mix album
“ah, the scalene triangle”
XD vs :D discourse
the most reblogged picture on tumblr
doge
men of tumblr
the cursed long ass “fedoras arent that bad!” post
touch my butt and buy me pizza
spread this like wildfire
tumblr university (complete with uniforms)
tumblr island
tumblr nation
these all would lead to the creation and failure of dashcon
tumblr prom
Reading this gave me both nostalgia and fight-or-flight response.
Parks & Rec, Pretty Little Liars and the Fast & Furious films all exist in the same universe
And SCANDAL WTF
Oh jeez, SCANDAL….
….and BATTLESHIP too, apparently. It’s a goddamn conspiracy
Oh god. He’s on REVENGE too. How deep does this rabbit-hole go….
Oh my god. DEXTER.
THE ACTUAL NEWS
I read an interview with this guy (who is a real news anchor), and he said he told his acting agent that he is ONLY interested in parts where he plays a new anchor. This is no coincidence. This is by design.
a nsa agent in a suit looking through my laptop camera: she’s on her phone…….. our data shows that she’s got tumblr open on her laptop but she has tumblr open on her phone………. double check her browser?
some nerd hired straight out of college: *types rapidly* she’s definitely got tumblr open on her laptop
the nsa agent, softly: so why is she looking at it on her phone…..
My husband and myself have served in the military. When we call home from overseas, our lines are monitored and on a short delay so no sensitive information is revealed. The line will just go dead if you say something you’re not supposed to.
Now, these calls are monitored by a department in the military called Signal corps. When we’d talk on my husband’s last deployment, we had a running joke that we said hi to “Signal Guy Fred.”
So this continued for his entire 12 month deployment, and we made sure we said hi or bye to “Signal Guy Fred” every phone call. On his final phone call before returning home we made sure to thank “Signal Guy Fred” for his time and wish him farewell.
So, before I disconnect the call, I wish “Fred” the best and thank him for his service. My phone was on speaker mode (I was cooking dinner) and my finger was hovering over the end call button when I hear the softest little, “My name’s Jason.”
